Friday, April 07, 2006

Paris in Elle

It's such a natural pose...Paris with a rocket in her crotch.

So Not Summerish


Summer would totally not be doing these things. Rachel Bilson hits up American Idol to cheer for her favorite contestant. Adam Brody recently said this was their first season watching the show and that they are both obsessed with it.

Below she goes shopping with her 4 year old half sister and stepmother in rainy L.A. Hot umbrella!

Xtina is so Weird

Here's Christina Aguilera filming her latest commerical as Pepsi spokeswhore. I really can't figure out the theme other than skany outfits, headpieces, and pushup bras. But I see how that could make a person feel thirsty.

Jamie Lynn's Bday Bash

The whole Spears clan (minus Kevin, of course), went out to party for Jamie Lynn's 15th birthday the other day after the Kids Choice Awards. Brian, Jamie (dad), Lynn (mom), Brit Brit, and Sean Preston were all out to celebrate. I think her mom's outfit came straight from Forever 21. Jamie Lynn looks cute though.




KCav at Any Given Party

KCav is turning into a Fugly Stewart for me; she shows up everywhere, wanted or not, looking not quite right (hello orange skin?! Remember ARCTIC tan, not Mystic tan is in), smiling like Katie Holmes near the papo, and wearing the smock her stylist put on her to form yesterdays ponytail to a public event.

Stop it.

The Hart Family


Pink and Carey Hart posed together after her concert at the afterparty. He looks as hot as ever. She looks like she works at the MAC counter in Reno.

Still in Love


Orlando Bloom and Kate Bosworth get schmoopy at a party for a watch company in Geneva, Switzerland on Tuesday. I really like these two, they seem so happy and somewhat normal. Even if their combined weight is probably 190.

Biggest Bastard Award!



Looks like the winner from posts and emails is one Matt LeBlanc! Congrats buttplug!

Where in the World is LiLo?



Shopping for DVDs at Best Buy in Hollywood with some friends. She's such a normal girl, right? Minus that atrocious outfit.

Dunzo: Bow Wow and Ciara

Rapper Bow Wow, 19, and hip hop princess Ciara, 20, have gone their separate ways after a year of dating. They say the split was amicable. The two collaborated on the song "Like You" and frequently walked the red carpet together, with Ciara wearing a diamond ring on her finger. Bow Wow says it was "just a little gift."

Um, she's like a 10 and he's like 10 inches tall, so I'm sure she'll move on just fine.

Dunzo For Realz: Kim and Eminem


Kim Mathers called a Detroit radio station to talk about her impending divorce from Eminem. She said that Em was having more problems dealing with his pill addiction, starting right before the wedding. Kim claims she tried to delay the wedding, but Eminem pushed the issue and they wed. Kim hasn't spoken to Eminem in the past six weeks and claimed that the divorce papers were a surprise to her.

Eminem responded with a statement, beginning with how he hoped to keep the details of their divorce private, but wished to respond to Kim's statements. He claims that he has not relapsed and that Kim was well aware of his intentions of divorcing her for the second time. The couple has two children, Hailie and then Alaina, whom they adopted (she is Kim's niece). Kim also has another child from another relationship.

Thursday, April 06, 2006

Time to Vote for the Biggest Bastard!

If you aren't into posting, you can always email me. The nominees are:

Jude Law
for cheating on his girlfriend when she was really hot and being a cocky sex addict with a small willy












Matt LeBlanc
for cheating on your wife with a co-star and becoming such a cliche, not to mention leaving your 2 year old disabled daughter fatherless






Billy Crudup
for leaving your pregnant girlfriend after cheating on her with Claire Danes and for voicing countless annoying MasterCard commercials







Chad Michael Murray
for being a serial cheater, for marrying too young, for losing Sophia, and for proposing to a high school beauty queen


THE POLLS ARE NOW OPEN.

Lilo Gets Duffy?


LiLo has been visiting the dentist frequently as of late. Is it possible that she finally gave in and is getting horse teeth installed? So Hollywood. She doesn't look to pleased about being photographed, which is pretty rare for her. I think she stole this ensemble and glare from Sienna Miller.

Who knows, maybe it's just a Red Bull cavity in need of filling?




Passions, The Clothing


Those of you who know Jessi Harper's big sis Emily are aware that she is on Passions, the daytime soap opera. Her character is "Fancy Crane" and is thought so highly of, NBC Entertainment has created a fashion line based on her character.

www.cranecouture.com

There are tons of websites dedicated to her too which really surprised me. I've never seen this show, but I guess maybe she's more famous than our beloved Bree Turner now? Our high school is a minefield of talent, I say.

D.O.N. + Peeps

I love Peeps. In college, everybody found out about this and would always bring me a package home whenever they went to the grocery store, Target, Circle K, what have you. This meant I'd have enough boxes to move around on a forklift. I'd O.D. on them, knowing that they would go stale if they were left open for too long and would bounce off the walls like a crackhead.

This makes me happy to know I can now open a factory in addition to my Peeps warehouse.

Also, did anybody see Lost last night? I think Hurley may have gotten his start on Peeps, too.

Newest Accessory: White Legs

This is a very trendy new look in Hollywood, so be sure and copy it as soon as you can. I plan on capitalizing on this trend by opening a chain called "Arctic Tan," where you can have a fine white mist applied to your entire body and be as chic as possible.

Kate Beckinsale models the look in Santa Monica while out shopping with her husband and a fag. Or is it "her husband, a fag"?

Happy Bastard Day!



Keep those nominations coming and we'll crown the biggest bastard at the end of the day!

Attack of the Maltipoo!


Daisy, Jessica Simpson's maltipoo, clawed at the starlet's eyeball while in New Mexico. Jess is filming Employee of the Month. She went to the hospital to be treated, but did not require any stitches.

That's what she gets for adopting such a ferocious beast!

Where in the World is LiLo?


In L.A. at the Sienna Los Angeles store opening. Great news, LiLo lovers! For the third time, Lilo is hosting SNL on April 15th with musical guest Pearl Jam. Hotness! I wonder if she'll joke about her anorexia and party habits again? Methinks not.

CMM & His Fiancee




These pics are from a charity basketball game for One Tree Hill showing Chad Michael Murray and his new teen fiancee WHO IS STILL IN HIGH SCHOOL. She looks like his little sister! Below are pics of the newly engaged couple from yesterday morning, where CMM escorted Kenzie in the North Carolina Azalea Festival Queen's Welcoming Ceremony at the local airport. Where does he get the money for an engagement ring each year?

These photos have inspired me to proclaim this Bastard Day here at D.O.N. Matt LeBlanc, CMM, and who else should be honored today?


Hot Couple of the Minute: Matt LeBlanc and Andrea Anders


Scandalous! People is reporting that the demise of Matt LeBlanc's marriage was due to his affair with his Joey co-star Andrea Anders (pictured together at left). In January, Matt abruptly moved out of his home he shared with his wife, Melissa, and their daughter, which came as a total surprise to Melissa. In March, she accused him of being involved with another woman, which he admitted to. Melissa still hoped for a reconciliation when she got a surprising call from Matt's lawyers saying he had filed for divorce.

Who knew he was such a scumbag??

Wednesday, April 05, 2006

Olsens Love to Shop



Sisters love to act alike, especially twins (except for Kelly on 8th & Ocean, right?). Ashley Olsen hits the streets of New York in super tall heels, ciggy pants, and a disgusting top along side her bodyguard. Below, Mary Kate and her bodyguard, who happens to be an inch taller than her, shops in L.A. in ciggy pants, super high heels, and an extremely gross top.

True or false: you will never catch Jennie and I wearing any of the above? I like those red heels, but my feet would fall off before I buckled them.

LOL: Katie Holmes


Perez Hilton posted this pic and it has to be the strongest proof for those who believe Katie has been wearing a fake bump and timing the pregnancy with the release of MI:3. I mean, COME ON!

Hot Couple of the Minute: Lance Armstrong and Jessica V.


Lance hit up Priviledge on Sunday with his new lady toy Jessica. Little is known about her other than she is 23, from Newport Beach, and looks like KCav in few years.

Reunions!


Tha Dogg Pound has reunited with alpha pup Snoop Dogg for a new CD that will drop this summer. Man, I lived for them when I was like 14. "New York, New York" and "Let's Play House," LOVE IT! I'm totally going home and digging out this CD.

Rumor or Reality?

Damn, so much gossip today! Reportedly Eminem has filed for divorce for the second time from wife Kim Mathers. Papers were filed this morning after the couple remarried in January. Like we couldn't see that one coming!

Hot Couple of the Minute: Heather Locklear and David Spade

More rumors circling, people! It must be spring in L.A., right?

Apparently Heather Locklear, who is currently working a divorce from Richie Sambora, has been dating David Spade on the DL for awhile now. They were spotted together and reportedly were making out at L.A. club Jones last week.

Damn, he must be really funny...

Avril is Fake!


I never would have guessed that Avril was living under a pile of fake hair. I really believed it was all hers and not some nasty weave. But I was wrong. And with her short hair she looks disturbingly like Kirsten Dunst.


Tivo Watch: So NoTORIous

So I hope you all caught the premiere of Tori Spelling's So NoTORIous on VH1. I obviously was preoccupied with the rapidly declining Grey's Anatomy, but made sure to Tivo the midnight re-run. The show is pretty good (not Real Housewives of OC good, but not bad). She really does rip on herself alot, but not half as much as she does on her mom. There is also way too much self-pity involved, but I think that's just her reality.

Here's Tori out with her fiance in SoHo. Those boots are so Payless and he is so Roger from Rent in that outfit.

Bump Watch: Fergie?



Rumors have been spinning that Fergie is pregnant. She has stopped wearing her ab bearing outfits and has altered some of her stage costumes, just as Gwen did when she got knocked up.
All I can say is if this is true, the world will have a new Mark Anthony look alike on hand. Let's hope those genes aren't dominating and that Josh's beauty will prevail.








Do it!

News in a Flash

Sandy Brooks, ex-wife of Garth, was kidnapped at gunpoint by an employee on her ranch. She fled to safety and the kidnapper has been apprehended.

Cameron Diaz has won her lawsuit against the photographer who took topless pictures of her at age 19 and attempted to sell them back to her for millions.

Katie Couric leaving the Today show to helm a CBS nightly news program and become a regular contributor on 60 Minutes. Meredith Vieira replacing Katie and leaving behind her former program, The View. Who wouldn't trade Star Jones for Matt Lauer?

Teri Hatcher revealing that she is not dating Ryan Seacrest and is single and looking. Ryan revealing on-air that she is beautiful and they are an item. I guess Teri's paycheck didn't clear and she's pissed.

Tom Cruise: Victim

Tom Cruise has revealed that his father was highly abusive to him until age 12 when his mother took him and his sister and left. He tried to reconcile with his father when he was dying of cancer, and his father saw him on the condition that Tom not discuss their past.

Of his dad, Tom said, "For me it was like, 'There's something wrong with this guy. Don't trust him. Be careful around him.' "

Um, Katie? From Tom's mouth to your ears.

Katie is due any minute now.

Tuesday, April 04, 2006

Paris Speaks Up


Perez Hilton is reporting that Paris Hilton finally speaks up (a little) about her feud with Nicole Richie in next month's Elle. Excerpt from Perez Hilton's site:

"She (Nicole) cannot stand being around me because I get all the attention and people really don't care about her," Paris told Elle. "I've been best friends with her since I was two, but when I brought her on to my show, she got very jealous and turned on me for no reason."

In fact, Paris drew upon her feud with Nicole as inspiration for her new album, working on a song aptly titled Jealously, which is a pretty yet gritty track.

"It breaks my heart," continues Paris about the rift between the two girls. "She was my sister. She was the funniest person to be around and then she let the fame go to her head. She's not the same person any more. I never want to speak to her again - ever."

Despite those feelings, Paris and Nicole were recently forced to both appear on The Simple Life 4. However, Paris reveals that producers didn't really want Richie involved.

"They want to do it with just me, but we're both under contract together," Hilton says. "[Nicole] has nothing else so she really wants to do it, but I don't."

She claimed in the interview that Nicole had used Paris' name to promote her book The Truth About Diamonds, which was gost written (though Richie denies that).

"It's really pathetic that she needs to use my name to sell something because she's obviously not enough."

The full interview appears in Elle, on newsstands this week.

No More Lawsuits, Just Swimsuits!



I've given up my lawsuit against Playboy, as reported by Yahoo! today. I was pretty pissed when they used my unauthorized, if totally smoking hot, bod on their cover in a pic which I took to promote my film, not for their use. I felt it would only lead to confused fans hoping to see me more naked than I usually am, which is still pretty naked.

Hugh Hefner issued a public apology and has agreed to give cash to my favorite charities, which I'm down with. I'm so reasonable, it's just one more thing to hate to love about me!

Catching Up with KCav

Kristin Cavalleri is in Blender once again. Here is her interview from Blender via Bricks and Stones:

You went from junior year of high school to being a celebreality star. Have you had a pinch me moment?
I've had a lot of them. The first was when I got the cover of Seventeen. And a couple of weeks ago I was on Letterman. Everyone was warning me, "He might be mean to you." And I was so nervous, like, my mind was completely blank.
What kind of music do you like?
I just love Gwen Stefani. But I also like the Rolling Stones and the Eagles too.
You're in a Teddy Geiger video
Oh, right, he's another musician I absolutely love.
Yeah, sure.
I swear! I'm not just saying that because I was in his video!
In the video, you pick the sensitive, outcast musician over the hunky, popular jock. Would you make the same choice in real life?
I would pick the musician. I swear to God! I'm not just saying that! I've never been attracted to jocks - musicians are more down to earth; they just have more to talk about.
You and Teddy make out underwater in the video. That's a nice way to make a living.
It's a lot harder than it looks. I kept getting water up my nose, and then I'd spit water into Teddy's mouth. We had to do at least 20 takes. It was a lot of kissing. We were in the pool for, like, two hours. I had the best time.
In the pool scene, you're wearing a bikini. On Laguna Beach, there are lots of scenes of you wearing a bikini. Did MTV producers ever say, "Hey Kristin, maybe you could wear a bikini in this next scene"?
I'll tell you this: No one's life is that interesting. And I don't think it was portrayed accurately at all.
How come we never saw you studying or anything?
I know, good question. Would you want to watch me studying? Probably not.
OK, then, for the record: Did you ever study?
Yeah. I did, like, really well in high school. I got a 3.6 GPA.
Which was the toughest episode of Laguna Beach for you to watch?
Seeing my boyfriend Stephen lying to me and cheating on me with Lauren, that was hardest. He got a few phone calls from me after I saw it. [Laughs] There are certain other things you don't want on national television, like me on spring break in Cabo, dancing on the bar. All of my friends were up there on the bar with me, but of course MTV made it seem like I was the only one up there.
In the first episode, Stephen says you're a "good girl to hook up with" but that Lauren would make a better girlfriend. That must've been hard to watch.
Yeah. But at the same time, he ended up with me, so something went right.
Now that Lauren has her own reality show on MTV, would you appear on it? Probably not. I'm moving on. I want to segue into acting.
Plus you really hate that little bitch, right?
I don't hate her. I don't hate her. I don't hate her. We're just completely different. I'm very loud and I speak my mind.
What do people who don't like you say about you?
That I'm a bitch. I seemed like a bitch on Laguna Beach, so that's a completely understandable opinion.
Are you a little bit of a bitch?
OK, here's the thing. People think I'm a bitch because I'm very honest, brutally honest. I'll tell you what's on my mind. But no, I think I'm a very nice person. Unless you do something to me.
OK. We won't. What's the question you're most tired of being asked?
There are a couple: "Is Laguna Beach real?" "Do you really hate Lauren?" And "Did Stephen and you really date?" Some people think we're 25-year-old actors who don't live in Laguna. Some don't even think Kristin's my real name. I'm like, "No, that's real."
Tell me about your boyfriend, Brody Jenner.
He's the drummer in a band called Facehumper.
If we drug-tested you, what would we find?
Just alcohol. Nothing else. I swear to God. Even if I wanted to do drugs, I've been working so much that I couldn't.
You've never smoked marijuana?
No. [Laughs]
Hmm. That laugh doesn't seem very convincing. Plus, you told Teen People that you've tried cocaine.
Yeah, I tried it in Laguna. I know a lot of people who do it, it was around in my high school, but it's not for me. It's fun for 20 minutes, but the kind of people who do it are shady. They lie a lot, they're always on guard like they're trying to hide something. They have to lie about doing coke so they'll lie about doing other stuff. Lying's my No. 1 thing - I hate that.

Ok, no jocks? We know you dated Matt Leinhart. Never smoked pot growing up in a beach town? Seems totally realistic. GPA a 3.6? Right, with that GPA, your dad's money, and your psuedo celeb status you couldn't get into USC? I'm thinking the GPA was more like a .36...

Happy Birthday Jamie Lynn!


"I believe the children are our future. Teach them well and let them lead the way..."

Jamie Lynn Spears turns 15 today, which is the age at which my beloved Brit Brit recorded "Baby One More Time" and began her climb to pop superstardom.

Just looking at this picture breaks my heart. Look how hot Britney was! I never thought Jamie could take her place, but given recent shots of her, she is looking much better than her big sis. Bring it on, Jamie Lynn, we're ready for you!

Can She Be This Dumb?


Jessica Simpson is reportedly being courted for a part in the upcoming Baywatch Movie. She would play a lifeguard. (duh)

I find it hard to believe that even Jessica is stupid enough to take this role. If she has any ambition as an actress, she'd know to hit up an indie film quickly. Of course, that will never happen because with Papa Joe it's all about the benjis and she won't be lining his pocket on the set of an indie, that's for sure.

Brit Brit Gets her Hair Did


Britney gets her hair and nails done at a Malibu salon. While this type of self-maintenance is appreciated, a bra would be, too.

WTF: Kimora and Russell Simmons

Russell Simmons insists that his relationship with Kimora is not going to change at all, despite the fact that the two are separated and that he confirms he has been dating (but not sleeping with) 23 year old model Denise Vasi. He says he will continue to produce her new VH1 show (God help us), collaborate with her in fashion, and in raising the children. He doesn't care if she gets a new boyfriend, but as of now they still share a house and a bed.

This all means one thing to mean: their marriage was nothing more than a business arrangement and will continue to be a business arrangement. Sick.

You've Got to Be Kidding Me


Chad Michael Murray is now engaged to just turned 18 year old One Tree Hill extra Kenzie Dalton. Last September his OTH co-star and real life wife Sofia Bush left him, refusing to state why but alluding to his notorious reputation for cheating. Kenzie recently took 2nd place in Miss Teen North Carolina and plays a cheerleader along side Sofia on the show.

An 18 year old girl less than a year after your last marriage?? Come ON!

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